Good evening & welcome back to your favorite TV show called “The weekend from hell!”, where everything that can go wrong, will go wrong! If you want to feel better about your own life, you tuned it at just the right moment! Congrats!
Let’s see what happened at this already sinister sounding episode of “The weekend from hell!”
First off, on my way to the Boondoggle company visit on Friday – a super fancy schmancy hipster cool communication agency located in my former home base of Leuven – my MacBook started flashing. As in: my screen was flashing from background to background and my dock was nowhere to be found. Not a great way to start an already frustratingly early morning, but alrighty then… Once I finally got home, the flashing thing happened again and I took it upon myself to do a little research on the net – Gen Y people, gotta love ’em. Most users said one particular program was interfering with the Mac’s operating system, but that removing said program would probably only be a temporary solution. The flashing would, most likely, return.
So what do I do, besides being a total Gen Y-geek & researching the net like that? Obviously, I contact Coolblue, the online retailer where I bought my Mac and which is famous for its amazing customer service. If anyone was wondering: yes, they do respond within a time frame of 30 minutes. Why? Because they’re f#cking awesome. The only sad part about the exchange was that they gave me the same answer as my research did: “Try resetting your entire operating system and reinstalling just basically everything”. Ah… Yes, the glorious “Weekend from hell!” was starting to take shape.
Since it was already getting late on Friday night – transferring files when you have nothing else but silly little USB sticks, your life can suddenly seem like it’s not worth living (yes, overly dramatic, but as of Friday I was crowned “drama princess”, so I aim to live up to that great honor okay?) – I decided to leave the bulk of the Sisyphean task until Saturday.
So come Saturday, I came pretty darn close to resetting my system until I realized I didn’t know what would happen to my beloved, newly-purchased Keynote? If you don’t know the program: it’s the Apple version of Powerpoint and works infinitely better, I can promise you that. Of course, I contact my favorite help desk at Coolblue and immediately receive the heartwarming answer I was hoping for: “Linked to your Apple ID, so you can just reinstall it from the App store afterwards”. Bingo! Why thank you kind sir…
However… Then I notice the mother of all question marks: what about Microsoft Office? I have only one Office for Mac license and will I not lose my product key by doing this? It’s happened to me once before, on an Acer laptop: suddenly, there was no more Office for this girl. And while Word doesn’t exactly give me the good kind of shivers down my spine, it is a pretty valuable program on any kind of computer. So I check with some of my friends, who then advise me to “deactivate my Office license”, since the chance does exist that I would lose my product key. However, I know of the beautiful bounties of online chat support – Cheers to you Coolblue! – and I contact Microsoft Office for this particular matter, just to be sure. First I’m apparently talking to the “wrong kind” of Microsoft support, the lady just can’t help me so then she – thank goodness – transfers me to someone who can. Ok, not a particularly great start, but I’ll take it.
But then… Then the mother#cking shit hits the fan, y’know?
“You’d better prepare yourself for losing that product key ma’am.”
YOU SAID WHAT NOW? I buy a house, load it up with furniture, decide to clean my place and you tell me my freakin’ furniture’s gone? WHY ARE YOU STEALING MY STUFF YOU PIECE OF SH*T?! No joke. That’s all he told me. There was no way he could possibly help me and all I could do was, maybe, contact Apple support to see if they could help. Un-freakin’-believable.
Of course, that’s when I told him that, though I don’t blame him specifically – never shoot the messenger, that’s just downright tacky – I did explain to him the values of doing business and how that business always revolves around THE CUSTOMER. Hehe, this is where my marketing schooling has totally paid off in full, because I went into a tirade about how all the Fortune 500 companies of 20 years ago were now no longer in existence and that, if Microsoft keeps this sh*t up, they’d be completing that list fo’ sho’. I didn’t exactly stay in the chat box to listen to a reply, but I sure felt so much better afterwards. Until I realized I still didn’t have a solution to my Office-problem and the hours to still relax and take a breather this weekend seemed to tick, tick, tick away…
Apple Support then: a nice Dutch guy on the phone called me and asked me what the problem was. I explained the situation – my technical support had, technically, expired, but I claimed a “special circumstances”-card – and he completely agreed in the ridiculousness of Microsoft in that moment. So yes, I was starting to feel better. When you’re having a tirade-moment and someone is totally nodding his head, agreeing with you and even adding on some o’ that sweet sugar… Yeah, alright, you show ’em. And this nice Dutch guy – I’m sorry, I must continue to refer to him as “nice”, because he was, and “Dutch”, because he certainly was that too – then told me to go find an external hard drive, empty it out and Time Machine the hell out of my sweet & lovely little MacBook.
Since the only external hard drive I have – that’s still in working condition – is one of 2 TeraByte with only 800Gb remaining… I couldn’t possibly empty it out. Thankfully, I was home and my dad has one lying around the house. So I transferred his files to another hard drive, so I could use that external hard drive for some sexy Time Machining on my own hard drive. You still following? Yes? No? Who the hell cares: it’s hell weekend and none of that matters anyways.
What does matter is the following: I succeeded. Today, on Sunday, I flabbergasted even myself and succeeded in what seemed to take forever! It took me almost 24 hours – and with that I mean actual hours, as in “hours that I’m awake and working on this and not doing something fun, since it’s weekend and all that” – but I freakin’ succeeded in completely resetting my system, getting Office from my Time Machine-back-up, reinstalling every single thing I needed back, retransferring my ever-so-necessary files and returning my dad’s external hard drive, which had all his old files on it again. I SUCCEEDED! Holy moly, right?
As for the score count concerning this blogpost… Well, I do believe Murphy has seriously beaten the crap out of me, what with his flashing MacBook screen and turning Office into a nightmarish hell I couldn’t seem to wake up from. But, I also think I deserve a point for winning the game in the end. I mean like, dude came at me with a baseball bat, but somehow I made it out alive and kicking?? That’s worth something! And as for my MacBook?
Well… Purrin’ like a kitten babe.